Lessons From Living a Public Life

Let me be clear.  I am not a celebrity. If I am famous – which is not for me to say – I am unaware of that fact. From time to time, I have received kind notes of gratitude for my work and that feedback is always great to get. However, I have always led a very public life.  Not because I purposely sought to do that; it just seemed to turn out that way.

In the village where I grew up in NJ, I participated in a lot of activities that kept that public side in view including baseball, theater, music, public speaking, and elected office in school. So people knew who I was even though I did not know them. In my current life, I have been working with one client for pretty much my entire freelancing career.  During that time I have met well over a thousand people in just this one company. A very common occurrence is that someone will say, “Oh, I saw you at the grocery store or in the hall or at such and such a play last week.” When I hear comments like that it makes me realize two things: Others are observing me without my seeing them; and I better pay attention to my behavior because others are!

Last week I was in the left-hand turn lane waiting for the oncoming traffic to pass so I could enter the parking lot of my favorite coffee shop for a caffeine fix before my next meeting. There was a driver behind me honking to seemingly get me to turn into the traffic.  I am wondering “who is this person?” as I looked in my rear view mirror.  Fortunately, I remained calm. I turned into the parking lot, and noticed the other vehicle following me. We both parked and out pops a client with who I am currently working, who was just excited to see we went to the same coffee shop and was only trying to greet me! Had my behavior been different, I could have really blown it.

The point of this blog entry is this.  I have learned a lot of lessons in my life. Some of the learning has even been painful; fortunately, most has not.  I wanted to share this lesson especially with Millennials.  More and more people – particularly Gen Y – have a more public persona online than ever before .  Between blogs, Twitter, FaceBook, and LinkedIn  we are all more “public” than we know.  And I am stunned by how much some people reveal about themselves.  As an example, one of my favorite blogs, http://www.askamanager.com had a post about a resume that listed that person’s personal blog on a behavior best left to the privacy of ones own home. Now most of you who know me well recall that I make it a point to be as nonjudgmental as possible in all of my interactions with others. So what people choose to reveal about themselves – particularly online – is up to them.  I would just encourage everyone to think about the future consequences of revealing that personal tidbit.  People – some of whom you will never know – will notice.

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