Back when I was an adjunct professor in an Executive MBA program, I recall the time one of my students, the CEO of a small interior design business, called me to renegotiate the deadline for an assignment. As it happened, she was the victim of a “perfect storm where unexpected work and personal life events converged to disrupt her otherwise well-planned schedule. As she put it, “Life happened and it wasn’t on my planner!
I personally know how disruptive and disconcerting these unexpected life events can be. Five years ago today my wife Maureen died of metastatic breast cancer. During the fourteen months of her illness, I made a commitment to her that I would be there for every doctor appointment, every chemotherapy session, and any other event where she needed my support. Given that I have had my own business since 1991, I had some flexibility in my own schedule, and so I was able to do what I promised , almost. I did miss one doctor’s appointment.
When we found out she was terminally ill, I contacted my clients to let them know that at that point my priority was to serve as Maureen’s primary caregiver and that I’d need to postpone some of the work we had going. Fortunately, I was blessed with very understanding clients , all of whom said, “The work will be here when you’re ready again.
The reason I tell this story is that the challenges that we face in our personal lives, whether it is a serious illness, a death of a loved one, or some other tragedy do happen , and they happen with some regularity. I would bet that most of the readers have either had their own personal issues to deal with or have known a co-worker who has gone through some tough times. The question that I think managers and leaders in organizations need to ask is when these events do occur how do you handle them.
My experience is that many managers dance around these issues because they simply do not know what to do. The first call needs to be to the senior human resources person in the organization to get clear on what are possible ways to provide support to the individual in times of crisis. Things like the Family Medical Leave Act can provide some guidance.
What employees may often find helpful is simply the friendly support from someone who has had their “hardship card punched , someone who is going through what they are experiencing , and often times that someone can be a person who is outside of your organization.
The key here is that we all need to be sensitive to those times when “life happens and it’s not on our planner.